The Invisible Car Strikes Again?

By John Graham

Years ago the new cars were revealed with much fanfare in September and October. Nowadays, not so much. I remember back in 2009 when Chevrolet introduced its newly updated Malibu, and they had a set of very funny ads of people walking past tan Malibus and never noticing them. 

With some cars, people would run into because they were so invisible. One ad about bank robbers hopping into a tan Malibu and the police running by them was done so well it has become internet folklore as being true. (http://preview.tinyurl.com/nkdravu) I have to say I was proud of GM for the willingness to make fun of their own car (I bet they are wishing they could make recalls invisible but that is for a different day).

My recent rental was one of those invisible cars, to protect its identity I won't tell you it was a Nissan Versa. It was one of those kinds of cars that you just don't notice on the road, in the neighborhood, maybe in your own garage. It was one of those cars that your neighbor brings home and a month later you say to your neighbor:

"Hey, I thought your car was silver, This one is gold?" 

It was one of those cars that you pick up at the dealership with little to no excitement and don't bother showing it or telling anyone that you just bought a new car. It is not a bad car, but it is just transportation.

My question, or maybe just musing this month, revolves around the question 'Is there a place for the 'invisible' car?' My premise is "no."

I own a Fiat 500 Pop. Bought it used with 14,000 miles, remainder of the factory warranty and for an unbelievable price. Even new, the Fiat is a wonderful car and for an out the door price in low $16,000 dollar range is a lot of value. It is one of the few new cars out there that make me smile when I drive it. I have another car - a 2011 Ford Fiesta - again, bought it used, like the Fiat, new with a realistic sticker price of mid-$16,000 is a great car. Both cars come with all the 'standard' features we come to expect - power windows, power locks, A/C, AM/FM-CD stereo, fancy trip computer, six-way adjustable seats, Bluetooth connection, iPod connection, aluminum wheels - well, you get the point. These cars drive nice. Super fast, no. Sporty, I will say yes. Peppy for around town driving, most definitely. Comfortable - my first outing in the Fiesta was 8+ hours. Nary an ache to be found.

What else separates these cars or cars produced by Kia, Hyundai and Mazda that sets them apart from other makes and models? They are not invisible. Kia and Hyundai make some of the best looking cars out there built with quality, in the USA by the way, with a phenomenal and unbeatable warranty. Mazda really does put the 'zoom-zoom' into cars and are always a joy to drive.

So why do car manufacturers continue to churn out cookie cutter boxes that are boring, uncomfortable and joyless to drive? There are cars like the Yaris, really, can they make it much more boring, inside and out? How about the Versa - oh my. I would easily run into one because they are so bland. The Taurus, Camry, Impala - compare what they look like and drive like compared to the Sonata, Optima, Mazda 6 - not even on the same continent. Be careful with the first three listed, you may nap while driving.

In my world there is no reason for one a boring car. In someone's else's world I guess there is. The one who thinks of cars only as transportation, as an evil necessity, as an appliance. The ones buying the appliances - do they really not care about a nice looking car? Do they dislike driving so much they it just makes no difference how the car handles? If you offered them two cars, same price, same features, same quality and one was nice looking, would they still rather get the non-descript vehicle? I say no, I think it is more about education on car purchasing than just not caring about what you drive. People think that an inexpensive car has to be boring. In the words of the recently passed John Pinnette, 'Nay, nay.'

Let me share my insights into buying a car::

• Few cars are, if any, not built with high quality these days - so get out of your Toyota, Nissan, Honda rut and look at other brands. Kia/Hyundai - beautiful cars with the best warranty out there. FIAT - yes, FIAT, makes some great cars and again, great warranty. MINI - I always thought they were overpriced - I now own a Countryman because I decided to look more closely. It was as affordable as any small SUV and a whole lot more fun to own and drive.
• Buy used - don't be afraid. Remember the cars mentioned above? Most of the used cars you will buy today will have the remainder of the warranty - so little to no risk. Many cars are leased and nothing wrong with them - I just turned in a 2-year-old Ford Escape Limited - window sticker of $32K in 2012. About 20,000 miles and it will probably sell for $18K with two years of warranty left.That's the price of an optioned Yaris.
• The internet is your friend. Shop high and low, near and far, big and small and...well you get the idea. Maybe that car you love is 400 miles away, so what? Have a fun weekend trip, and with the money you save make it a weekend and enjoy yourself.
• We have CarFax, dealer reviews, E-Bay guarantees, and a host of other protections, so you can almost buy a car site unseen. I don't recommend it, but you almost could do that.

Of the millions of invisible cars sold, I would have to say only 10 or 15 percent of the people purchasing them truly say 'I really couldn't care less about what I drive' or even 'I like this car.' The other 85 to 90 percent just don't realize that a nice looking, fun to drive, high-quality vehicle is available in their price range. So take some time, do some shopping and don't settle for the car that you will trip over in your own driveway because you can't see it. Take some time and buy the car you really want.

That's the thing about invisible cars, why own one when a fun one is out there?

Child Support is not a Weapon

By Helene Opocensky

So your relationship went south, and you are very, very angry with your former partner.  The two of you have children together, and you are in court getting a child support order.  It’s a stressful time and maybe an opportunity to get some revenge.  Should you use this time to try and make your ex-partner’s life a financial nightmare?

Don’t do it.  Sure you’re angry, but whether you are the custodial parent or the noncustodial parent, it is in best interests of everyone, including your children, to make the process as painless as possible.  Child support is not an instrument of revenge.  Its purpose, as you well know, is to provide financial support for your child from the absent parent, when he or she is no longer in the household providing direct support. Getting it should be a very straight forward process and it has been designed to be that. 

All states, in order to receive federal funding for the maintenance of families in need, are required to promulgate child support guidelines to be used in all cases involving support.  These guidelines are based on income and, regardless of whether or not you agree with the amount they indicate should be paid in your case, they will be applied.  

In order for you to be prepared for your court appearance, take the time to do and consider the following:

1. Review the child support guidelines applicable in your State.  If you know ahead of time how much the order will, it won’t come as a surprise.  They are available on line on your State’s website. If you want a physical copy, you can get it at any courthouse handling family law, or any state agency involved with child support. 
2. Make yourself familiar with any deviation criteria (reason why the guidelines should not apply in your case) and determine whether or not they are relevant to you.
3. Don’t make any other appointments for your court day.  Family court is very busy. Be prepared to spend the entire day, if you get out early consider yourself lucky.  If you don’t, it’s the norm.
4. Get your financial information together and fill out a financial affidavit ahead of time.  It will save you time and maybe get your case heard earlier because it is ready earlier.
5. If possible, talk to the other side ahead of time.  If you have any agreement you’ll be out earlier.  Remember though, that the agreement will have to be according to the guidelines.  The court is legally required to follow them.
6. Leave your children at home.  They do not need to be involved in this process.
7. Understand that, in most instances, when a family splits up, there is not enough money to take care of two households.  Child support won’t remedy that.  Be prepared to reallocate your budget.

Finally, when you are in court, seeing your former partner again, remember that child support is for taking care of children and that there is more to taking care of children than money.  It’s making sure that they have a safe and loving environment.  Financial security is part of that, but so is having parents who care about them enough to put their differences aside. Your children will feel more secure if they believe that their parents’ problems are not their fault, and you, as the parents, will feel better, putting the bad feelings behind you, getting on with your lives and knowing that you are doing what’s best for your children.

Helene Opocensky was born in Germany and immigrated to the United States as a child. After college graduation, she worked for an insurance company for ten years but, after filing a sex discrimination lawsuit against them, she was hired by her law firm and encouraged to attend law school. After graduation, she worked for many years in the child support department as an Assistant Attorney General for the State of Connecticut. She has recently released her debut young adult novel, Smoke and Mirrors.

 

 

April 2 is World Autism Awareness Day - An Open Letter from One Mom

Mother Of Son With Autism Carves A Strong Path for Advocacy From Her Determination To Bond And Connect With Her Child

Many of us may take for granted the fact that when our children were babies, they were cuddly, happy, and connected to us. However, for some families, often those with a child on the autism spectrum, those early bonding moments may seem unattainable or unrealistic.

 

For one mother in Utah, her incredible determination to bond with her son, Parker, lead to the creation of a product that not only helped her own family, but is now helping other families to reclaim those beautiful bonding moments they may have otherwise missed.

Here is her message to the world, as she strives to broaden the understanding and compassion for those with autism and their families:

When I look at my son, Parker, I am blown away by the journey we are on. As a parent with a special needs child who has been diagnosed with autism, I have my good days and sad days. I say “sad days” because there are days when I feel crushed by the weight of the what if’s.

What if he never goes to prom? What if he never goes to college? What if he never drives? What if he lives with me forever. What if he never understands how much I love him?

I barely remember what my life was like before he was born, let alone what it was like before his autism diagnosis. I’m not sure if it’s due to exhaustion… lack of sleep… or stress. Maybe it’s just the daily ordeal and the culmination of the hardest moments.

I’m bringing this up because over the last year, I really started to notice how my son and I are viewed. In society, at the park, in the grocery store, Starbucks, or even out to dinner with friends. The looks we get when our wacky and sometimes inappropriate behavior comes out -- I see it. I’m a mother. I have eyes in the back of my head and I see it. Always.

I’ve also noticed this on a larger scale, due to my recent involvement as an advocate working in my home state of Utah to increase funding for families with children on the autism spectrum. As the parent of a child with autism, you often have to fight even harder to get them the services and support they need to help them function and to normalize their daily life.

I have also started a company based on giving back to the autism community by donating a portion of sales to autism research. At the end of the day, I am a mother with a son who is viewed as different. He is viewed as less-than. It leaves ME feeling less-than and I am determined to do everything I can to change the way families dealing with autism are treated. My first reaction when my child is treated differently is to fight. To fight for his rights and the rights of others like him.

Our everyday existence continues to confirm my belief that advocating for those with autism and educating the masses is crucial. Society needs to embrace those that march to the beat of a different drum. Each day, I think to myself: “What can I do, as one single mother, to help educate the population about autism and the acceptance of those who are living it?”

I have learned an incredibly valuable lesson thus far on our journey: The fact is, ALL parents stress and stay up at night worrying about their children -- whether they have special needs or not. When it comes down to it, as parents, we have an overwhelming love and desire to see our children happy and healthy. Our worries may manifest themselves in different ways, but in the end, we never worry about anything like we worry about our children. And that is a universal truth.

As you are reading this blog post, I just have one thing to ask of you. Be kind to each other. We are all in this life together. Thank you.
 
- Kelly Johnson

About Kelly Johnson and Parker Time Potions

Kelly Johnson is the founder of Parker Time Potions pediatric massage oils, and mother to Parker. When Kelly noticed that her toddler son was developing at a “delayed” rate, she wanted to find a way to bond with him as the “normal” avenues of bonding were not effective. Through her research, Kelly discovered that pediatric massage was a meaningful way for her and her son to bond, leading her to formulate her own all-natural Parker Time Potions pediatric massage oils. Her son was since diagnosed with autism and Parker Time now also funds autism research by donating some of its proceeds to autism related causes. www.parkerpotions.com

Make Meal Planning Smarter in 2015

By Becky J. Beall

When my children were all youngsters, (and I have four that are very close in age) meal time in general was somewhat hectic. Planning what to cook only to discover a missing ingredient seemed to be a normal thing, along with all the last minute trips to the store to “grab a few items.”

By the time my children were all school age, I figured out a simple plan that saved me the most time and money of likely any other thing that I did as a mom. On Sunday afternoons I would sit down, plan out dinner for every night of the week and post it on the refrigerator. I would know in advance which days might be extra hectic and plan to cook things in the crock pot for those times.  This did three things for my family: it took the guess work out because half of cooking was deciding what to cook; it allowed the kids to see what was in store for the week; and lastly, my shopping list was made as I bought only what I needed for each meal. No more missing ingredients…no more walking aimlessly through the aisles trying to come up with dinner solutions in my head…and no more overspending on things I bought “just in case.”

I came up with menus that were a combination of healthy foods, old standbys (yes, macaroni and cheese often doubled as a veggie) and some desserts as well. Over time that menu was iconic on our refrigerator and the children absolutely loved it. I most remember my son exclaiming to his 7^th grade football coach, “Coach, we gotta get out here…we have beef tips on the menu tonight!”

I have a sample menu below to get you started and of course, you will know what your family likes so you can taper the menu. I always try to have something everyone likes on the menu. Good luck!

Sunday: Grilled barbecue chicken tenderloins, mashed potatoes, green beans, corn on the cob, rolls and brownies.

Monday: Ham steaks (broiled in the oven with honey and brown sugar glaze), mac and cheese, steamed broccoli, carrots and sliced cucumbers.

Tuesday: (Crock pot night) Beef tips, rice, green bean casserole and low fat chocolate pudding.

Wednesday: (Church night so had to be quick) Baked chicken nuggets, baked French fries, broccoli with cheese sauce and applesauce.

Thursday: (Crock pot night) Pot roast with potatoes and carrots, green beans and rolls.

Friday: Poppyseed chicken casserole, green beans, mac and cheese and Rice Krispie treats (homemade not out of a box).

Saturday: Grilled steak and chicken (some like one, some like the other), salad, baked potatoes, baked beans and fruit salad.

Other menu items that rotated included spaghetti, lasagna, chicken pot pie, meatloaf,vegetable soup, taco soup, potato soup, squash and other seasonal veggies, apple cake, and chocolate chip cookies.

Becky Beall is an area freelance writer and blogger for Birmingham Parent.